2007: Pretty Worthwhile!

Dear Investor,

The big word for BiggCo in 2007 was cost effectivity. As we are growing as a company we are learning new ways to spend less of YOUR money.

Sure, we had our set backs, but overall, we continued to get more bang for our buck and that’s a tradition we intend to carry into 2008. But first let’s start with a recap of ’07.

We saw a host of new products from our development team including the Accelerator Clamp, our no-nonsense alternative to cruise control. Though consumer action groups have requested that we recall the Clamp, we are standing by it. Our accountants pointed out that we can save $2 million by leaving it on the market and fighting the existing lawsuits. Which have been plentiful, but have included no deaths! (That can be traced directly to us). Save $2 million AND leave a product on the market? Now that’s what we call cost effectivity!

We are also proud to announce that in our continuous efforts at efficiency we will be expanding our operations overseas. Our cutting edge factory in Malaysia opened last August and has tripled the production rate of our American factories. We applaud our Malaysian friends for being willing to work long hours and against impossible deadlines! Their productivity means our profitability.

Speaking of profitability, did I mention that we cut health insurance for 90% of our employees replacing it with two state-of-the-art water fountains, plus a bench for resting? This has saved the company a cool $600 million a year. Now that’s a prescription for cost effectivity.

We’ve also eliminated our recycling program and replaced it with an environmental PR campaign. Did you know that with one TV campaign we can win more appreciation per dollar than a full three years of recycling? Well now you do.

Expect big things from us in 2008 as we work to eliminate such inefficiencies as the three day weekend and maternity leave.

Yours truly,

Dennis Hunge
CEO